Splatterhouse

Developed By: Namco Bandai Games

Playable on: Xbox 360 & Playstation 3

When I think of exploitation movies, there are two things that I hope are in abundance: tits and gore. At its core, Splatterhouse is definitely an exploitation title because two things are prominent: tits and gore.

Splatterhouse is a reboot of a 1988 side scrolling arcade game of the same name. Splatterhouse tells the story of Rick and his girlfriend Jennifer. Jennifer has an interview with Dr. West (Re-Animator anybody?), a professor of Necrobiology. Rick decides to tag along and once they arrive in Dr. West’s mansion, they are attacked by some of Dr. West’s experiments. Jennifer is kidnapped and Rick is mortally wounded. As he lies dying, Rick notices a mask that tells him that if he puts it on, it can help him save Jennifer. When Rick puts on the mask, named The Terror Mask, he is transformed into a giant Jason Voorhees/Hulk rip off.

Splatterhouse is a beat em up platformer that occasionally has some cool throwback 2D side scrolling segments. The majority of the combat is hand to hand combat and weapons, such as meat cleavers and my favorite, shotguns, can be picked up. All attacks can be linked together in combos, which felt very fluid, and after an enemy is killed, Rick collects their blood. The blood obtained from fallen enemies can then be used to buy upgrades for Rick. Some examples of upgrades include parts for a larger health meter or more combos to punish the undead creatures that roam around Dr. West’s mansion. Upgrades carry over to new games to justify playing through the game multiple times.

Another addition to the combat is Berserker mode. In Berserker mode, Rick turns into a monster himself, everything turns white, with the exception of the monster’s blood, as even more is spilled at this time, and Rick’s attacks become more powerful. Getting kills in Berserker mode is extremely gratifying. However, Berserker mode only lasts for a very limited time.

The writing dialogue was quite good. Rick and the Terror Mask have some pretty funny exchanges. Rick comes off as this humble guy trying to save his girlfriend, but the Terror Mask knows what kind of power he possesses and is not afraid to throw around the “F” word or make dick jokes.

Like many other games, Splatterhouse is littered with collectibles, allowing the gamer to go look for them if he or she decides to do so. These collectibles come in the form of torn pictures. Once all the pieces are found, they make a nude or semi-nude picture of Jennifer. I am a very linear game player, I just want to run through a stage as fast as I can, not go on some collectible looking side mission. However, I looked high and low in Dr. West’s mansion looking for the pieces of Jennifer’s pictures.

Another element that I thought made Splatterhouse unique was the soundtrack. Some bands on the track listing include: Five Finger Death Punch, Mastodon, and Lamb of God. I would never listen to any of these bands on my own time, but decapitating and disemboweling various monsters to these bands felt very fitting.

One fond memory of my childhood is playing video games on my Sega Genesis and one of my favorite games to play was Splatterhouse 2. Included on the disc, unlocked by playing through the story mode, is the entire Splatterhouse trilogy, complete in all there uncut gory glory. Having all three of the original Splatterhouse games on the disc was the biggest selling point for me.

Splatterhouse is not without its faults. My biggest complaint is its load times. Even with the game installed to my hard drive, some load times lasted up to a minute and a half or two. Some of the side scrolling segments were hard for me, so it was common for me to die, and to have to wait such a long period of time to try again just felt like insult to injury.

Level design also felt very uninspired and it feels like the development team stuck to a very strict color palette of reds and blacks. I was also disappointed in the small number of different creature designs. As you progress through the game, it feels like you are fighting the same monsters through the same stage. However, some of the boss battles were really cool, specifically the final boss fight.

When we watch exploitation movies, we turn the other way with bad acting, plot holes, and sometimes bad dubbing. If can look the other way with slightly repetitive gameplay, horrendous load times, and semi-bad level design, I recommend you check out Splatterhouse. It just may become your new guilty pleasure.

7 out of 10
Trailer for Splatterhouse:

Win Win "In The Game of Life, You Can't Lose Them All"

Directed By: Thomas McCarthy

Starring: Paul Giamatti & Alex Shaffer

Win Win tells the story of Mike Flaherty, a lawyer in New Jersey and head coach of a losing high school wrestling team that is afraid of losing his practice because of a lack of business. When he learns that the state of New Jersey is going to obtain guardianship of one of his elderly clients, Leo, Mike agrees to become his guardian, but only because he knows that Leo’s guardian receives a $1500 commission a month. Things get interesting when Leo’s 16 year old grandson, Kyle, shows up in New Jersey from Ohio wanting to live with him. Mike agrees to take Kyle in until they can arrange for Kyle to get back to Ohio. Mike soon learns that Kyle is an amazing wrestling and Mike is able to get Kyle to enroll in the high school he teaches at and gets him to wrestle for the team. However, things take a turn for the worse when Kyle’s mother shows up in New Jersey wanting to take Kyle and Leo back to Ohio with her.

The acting in Win Win I believe is what stands out the most. The way the characters are portrayed in it made it very easy for me to relate to them, specifically Kyle who has a very easy going nature, but with a possible dark past. I still found myself “rooting” for the character of Mike, even though he was scamming money off an elderly man because everything else seemed genuine about his character like his love for his family. I felt so emotionally attached to the characters that I was sad when the movie was over.

With several comedic scenes and lines from the supporting cast, Win Win provides multiple laughs. Win Win ultimately tells the tale that sometimes you have to do what is right, even though you might not benefit from it. I highly recommend it.

9 out of 10
Trailer for Win Win:

Watchmen "Who Will Save Us Now?"

Directed by: Zack Synder

Starring: Jackie Earle Haley & Jeffrey Dean Morgan

Watchmen tells the story of several masked vigilantes, with only one of them actually possessing super powers. Due to a public outrage, Richard Nixon, who is in his sixth presidential term, passes a bill that outlaws vigilantes. All of them decide to retire, with the exception of one, Rorschach. When another one of them, The Comedian, is murdered, Rorschach begins his own investigation believing that someone is killing masked vigilantes. However, Rorschach soon discovers that a much more sinister plot is at hand.

Based on a DC comic of the same name, multiple filmmakers have tired for years to adapt Watchmen into a movie. What makes the Watchmen comic interesting is that it was only a one 12 issue series. Take any another DC superhero that has had a movie, such as Batman or Green Lantern, and you know that there have been hundreds of comics written with those characters allowing screenplay writers to pick from hundreds of reference points for their movies. The screenplay writers of Watchmen had to stick closely to its source material, therefore creating a very faithful adaption of the comic book. I even read that the director, Zack Synder, allowed the actors to carry a copy of the graphic novel on set, so if a line in the script was different from the comic, the actors could say the line from the comic.

Watchmen is a bit of rarity in its field, it is a Rated R superhero movie and a “hard” R at that. With the exception of Kick-Ass and Super, I cannot think of another “hard” R superhero film. When Watchmen initially came out in theaters, it was financially performing poorly. So the screenplay writers, David Hayter and Alex Tse, asked people to watch it again in theaters because it was possibly discouraging big movie companies to not take chances on movies like Watchmen. So I did my part and watched Watchmen twice in theaters.

I believe Zack Synder was an excellent director for Watchmen for a couple reasons. One, he has proven that he is great with working with material that has already been established. For example, his remake of Dawn of the Dead in 2004, his adaption of 300 in 2006, and his adaption of Legend of the Guardians in 2010. He is also a great action director and his use of slow motion seems to always make a fight scene seem cooler.

Watchmen also contains my favorite opening credit scene ever. In Watchmen, you learn that there has been two groups of vigilantes from two different time periods. The opening credit scene in Watchmen tells the story of the first group of vigilantes in a very stylish fashion while even giving us some “insight” to some of America’s more controversial history.

From directing to storytelling to acting, Watchmen is a very memorable movie that I highly recommend.

9 out of 10
Trailer for Watchmen:

Skyline "Don't Look Up"

Directed By: The Brothers Strause

Starring: Eric Balfour & Scottie Thompson

Shot for the incredibly low price of 10 million dollars, Skyline tells the story of several individuals who are trapped in a high end LA apartment while aliens attack the city. The individuals are armed with a nifty telescope that projects an image on to their television screen, so whenever they are not on the roof of the apartment being chased by some alien, they can see and watch in terror what is going on below them in the city.

At the time of this writing, Skyline has an embarrassing 4.5/10 on imdb.com and a 16% on rottentomatoes.com and I believe I can explain why. Before the aliens start attacking, the film is allowed to establish its characters and develop situations for them that should later create tension and drama for the film. For example, we learn one couple has just gotten pregnant and that another character is cheating on his girlfriend. However, the characters and their relationships feel underdeveloped, and by the time the aliens start attacking, I don’t think anybody really cared what happened to the characters by this point.

However, character relationships, underdeveloped or not, is not the reason why I am interested in watching a movie like this. The creatures and their design is the major selling point for me. I read that the majority of the budget was spent on the effects and whoever’s decision that was, I must agree with them. There are multiple types of aliens and they all look really, really good. Of course there is a giant mothership, smaller ships that have giant tentacles coming out their back, a giant flying head (that amusingly resembles a vagina to me) with tentacles, a giant alien that is stories tall, such as Godzilla or the monster from Cloverfield, and the working class aliens that stand erect like a human being.

My favorite alien was the giant alien that is stories tall like Godzilla. Not only can this guy crush cars and buildings whenever he steps on them, he can shoot multiple tentacles out of his hand that catch people and then swallow them in his hand or take down massive targets like a helicopter. Even cooler, there are several of these dudes wrecking havoc on Los Angeles.

In my opinion, Skyline also suffers from some lame one liners, weird tough guy moments, and jet fighter scenes that resemble something from Independence Day. However, Skyline ends with a fairly memorable WTF scene that makes it worthy enough to at least be a Netflix rental. While that does sound kind of harsh, I actually want to encourage people to watch this movie. If you search for Skyline on imdb.com, one of the suggestions is Skyline 2 in 2012. If that's the case, I’m on board for a sequel.

My Rating: 6 out of 10
Trailer for Skyline:

Punisher #14

Written By: Rick Remender

Artwork By: Daniel Brereton & Tony Moore

Published By: Marvel Comics

***SPOILER ALERT***

Starting in Dark Reign The List: Punisher, in which Norman Osborn, the current head honcho in the Marvel Universe, comes up with a list of people he wants dead, sends Wolverine's demented son Daken to kill Frank Castle, The Punisher.

In a bloody fight on a rooftop, Daken literally tears The Punisher to pieces, dropping the remains of Frank Castle in a darkened, disgusting alley way.

Starting in Punisher #11, we learn that the Legion of Monsters has gathered the remains of Frank Castle and has been able to bring him back to life. But Frank is not exactly alive or human, but a true Frankenstien, in this case a FrankenCastle.
(Haha, get the play on words there? I didn't come up with it.)

In the next two issues we learn that Frank is not happy at all having been brought back to life, there is a monster hunter who has an entire army of monster hunters that wants to destroy the Legion of Monsters, and the Legion of Monsters are having a really tough time trying to convince Frank to help them.

***END SPOILER***

In Punisher #14, Frank learns who this head monster hunter is and there is a little twist to the guy.

Having read around the internet and the letters to the editor in the Punisher comics, I know that some people are not happy with the direction that the Punisher is being taken.

I, for one, think it is great. I think I have always liked the idea of reading horror comics and now the new Punisher arc allows me to do so.

I am very interested to see how they are going to bring Frank Castle back, or even if they are!

Punisher #14: 9 out of 10

BioShock

Developed By: 2K Boston/2K Australia

Playable On: XBox 360, Playstation 3, & Windows Operating System

Released in 2007, Bioshock tells the story of a city that was built under the Atlantic Ocean named Rapture. Rapture was built by a man named Andrew Ryan who believed that artists should not have to worry about censorship and scientists should not be held back by what is "morally right." Another man, Frank Fontaine, creator of plasmids, the ability to throw fire, electricity, and more from your hand, wants to be able to control the city. Soon, a power struggle commences between Ryan and Fontaine. You play as Jack, the lone survivor of a plane crash, that crashed over the Atlantic Ocean. You head down into Rapture only to learn that you are only a pawn in the ever growing war between Ryan and Fontaine.

Out of order, I played through BioShock 2 before I played through part 1. But having played through them both now, it was very easy to spot the differences between the two games and decide which one, in my opinion, is better.

BioShock is quite a lengthy, lengthy game. I probably put in somewhere between 13 and 15 hours before I actually beat it. The objectives that fill the story line in BioShock, I thought were so grand and epic, I always thought I was just around the corner from beating it. But I would actually end up putting in another two hours or so. I realize now that at those times, I was actually no where near beating the game.

The biggest difference, I believe, between part one and two is the combat system. If you read my review for part two, then you already know that BioShock is a first person shooter that allows you to have guns as well as plasmids, the ability to throw fire, electricity, use telekinesis, and more from your left hand. The major difference here is in part one. In part one, you can only have either one of your guns or one of your plasmid abililites out and ready for combat. You actually have to pull out either your gun or hand, not both, choosing which one would be more effective during a fight. In part 2, you can have your choice of which gun and plasmid you want out at the same time. A combo, such as stunning an opponent with electricity and then killing them by shooting them, is much more fluid in part 2 because both your gun and plasmid are out at the same time.

In addition to the combat system in part one, you can only melee with one weapon, the wrench! In part two, you can melee with every weapon, giving the combat system in part two another reason to be better. In part one, I hated not being able to shoot a splicer (enemies in BioShock) with a shot-gun (a close range weapon) and melee the splicer for the kill. In BioShock 2, this little combo would have resulted in instant death for a splicer.

As in BioShock one and part two, you have a EVE meter. Once you drain your EVE meter, you can no longer use your plasmids. However, throughout both games you can find EVE hypodermic needles and once you deplete your EVE meter, you can fill it back up if you have a EVE needle. With this system my complaint lies in part one. Once you drain your EVE meter, if you switch to a gun, your EVE meter will not refill. In part two, if you have a EVE needle and your EVE meter runs out, it will automatically refill. I found it to be very frustrating in part one to be in a fight with a bunch of splicers only to have my EVE meter drain and not refill because I had switched to a gun to continue the fight. In part one, when you do fill your EVE meter back up a squence on-screen commences in which you see Jack shoot-up with a EVE needle, which is cool like the first 10 times you see it, but then it gets pretty old when you have already put in about five hours into the game.

In both BioShocks, you have the ability to hack machines. Some of the machines that can be hacked in the BioShocks are vending machines that sell ammo and even gatling gun turrets that will fire at enemies once you have hacked them. In part one, when you go to hack a machine, the game pauses and goes into a mini-game in which you have to place a tube in correct order for a metalic liquid to go throw it. If you are too slow, the machine will shock you, causing you to lose life and have to start your hack over again. Some machines will set off an alarm when you don't successfully hack them, causing flying gatling gun turrets to chase you. In part two, the developers made the hacking system a little cooler. When you start a hack in part two, the game does not pause and you have to stop a needle, that is going back and forth, into small green areas, trying to aviod red areas, that will cause an unsuccessful hack and sometimes set off alarms. In addition to the hacking system in part two, you can hack machines from a distance using hack darts. That certainly beats having to walk up to a gatling gun turret or security camera to hack it as you have to do in part one.


The mini game that commences when you start a hack in BioShock

One type of machine that made an apperance in part one, but not in part two is the U-Invent machine. Throughout the game you find things such as glue, empty shell casings, kersone, and other random objects. When you take these random objects to a U-Invent machine, you can create new types of bullets and other items. This actually brings me to another complaint about part one. Throughout the story, you are forced to find objects to create something that is necessary for you to be able to proceed. I reason I don't like that is because it causes you to have to back track through the levels to find the items that are needed for whatever you are trying to make. The U-Invent machines and this system did not appear in part 2.

There are plenty of differences between BioShock one and two. But obviously part one paved the way for part two. And I am sure I am in the minority when I say this, but I liked part two more than part one. I will probably play through part 2 again, before I play through part one again.

I give Bioshock: 9 out of 10

Trailer for Bioshock:

BioShock 2 "We Will Be Reborn"

Developer: 2K Marin & Irrational Games

Playable On: XBox 360, Playstation 3, & Windows Operating System

The game is set in fictional dystopian city Rapture, in a steampunk alternative history 1968, eight years after the events of BioShock. The protagonist and player-controlled character is a Big Daddy, a being that has had its organs and skin grafted into an atmospheric diving suit. Among the first of its kind, the player-controlled Big Daddy reactivates with no recollection of the past decade's events, and scours the city in an attempt to relocate the Little Sister that he was paired with. When it becomes obvious that Rapture's leader Sofia Lamb will become responsible for the city's destruction, the Big Daddy attempts to overthrow Lamb and her army of Big Sisters.

(The above was taken from wikipedia.com)

The gimmick of Bioshock is that it is a first person shooter and you are able to upgrade your character by obtaining plasmids. With your left hand, plasmids allow you to throw electricity, fire, use telekinesis, and much more while still having a gun in your right hand. One of my favorite combos to use was stunning a opponent ("Splicers" as they are called in Bioshock for having used to many plasmids on themselves) with electricity and then finishing them off by shooting them with a double barreled shotgun.

In addition to all of the crazy guns your character can use, a giant drill, a rivet gun, shot-gun, rocket launcher, to name a few, you can get different types of ammunation for each gun. For example, with the shot-gun, why use regular shells when you can use phosphorus shells, shells that will ignite an enemy into a giant ball of flames after you shoot them.

In addition to the different types of ammo, you can even up grade your weapons. For example, with the gatling gun, you can upgrade it to reduce recoiling every time you fire it.

The environment, although gritty and dark, is still very inviting. With most games, I just want to run through them as quick as possible, but with Bioshock 2, I wanted to investigate every room and see what I could find, even if it had nothing to do with whatever my current objective was.

Aside from the gameplay and the great art direction found in Bioshock 2, probably my most favorite feature is the checkpoint system that is used. Through out the levels there are "Vita-Chambers." Every time you die, you respawn at the nearest Vita-Chamber. But what is so cool about Vita-Chambers is that you do not lose any progess that you have made after you die. For example, say you are in a boss battle and you take down half of the boss's life and then die. After you come out of a Vita-Chamber the boss's life will still be half down. You never, technically I guess, have to start over even after you have died.

One new addition to Bioshock 2 that part one didn't have is online multiplayer. The multiplayer uses a fairly common upgrade and ranking system that allows you to choose which weapons, plasmids, and tonics you spawn with. The more you play, you are given access to better weapons, plasmids, and tonics that you can choose to use in a match. And although I do think the multiplayer is cool, I'd rather just play Halo 3 or Modern Warfare 2 if I am going to be doing some online gaming.

The score is also way good. It certainly makes moments that need to be tense, such as preparing for a boss fight, tense. And the music that was used during load screens, sounding like 1950ish jazz music, I thought also really set the mood for the game. I know the special edition on Bioshock 2 came with a vinyl and I am assuming it is that music. I am sure it is cool to have.

Beleive it or not, as of this writing, I have never played through the first Bioshock. But after beating Bioshock 2, I have already gone and bought a copy of Bioshock 1 to play through.

I really don't think I found anything wrong with this game.

I give it: 10 out of 10 stars.

Trailer for Bioshock 2: